Just Another Day

I vote that we skip Father's Day.

I miss Dad.

This morning I played the piano for the church service in Big Valley - I had first gone to this church with Dad ...

I drove up to Edmonton and got to spend some prime time with Dad's youngest grandson, Levi, the one he never got to meet ...

Siblings exchanged photos and memories.

It's not the same.

And the sadness is not confined to just me: there are those men who are suffering from not being able to speak to either their father or their children. A pain sandwich on the day everyone traditionally goes out for lunch or dinner!

I got a beautiful letter from my friend Ilona this morning. She misses her darling Phil.

A dearly beloved family member lost his dad when he was about six.

Another friend sent a note this week: her dad's cancer has returned.

It's just a tough day all around.

But back at the ranch, a father's day gift:

The babies from last year came to check things out and to nicker their own father's day message to the man who loves them and plays with them every day. 

And there are all the dads and kids who got to spend time together today in the bright outdoors, prodigal sunshine spilling into cracks on the sidewalk and spattering Pollock-like on the greys of barn board and drab concrete, transforming them into fleeting works of art.

I'm reminded once more of the little Bible verse where God promises to be a father to the fatherless. I'm reminded of the story of the prodigal son.

I'm reminded of the awful time period where a son hung on a cross and his father could not look at him - the evil of the situation was too severe.

I'm indeed grateful to have been raised by one of the great ones. 

If it takes a dreary day to remind me of my myriad blessings, so be it!

Happy Father's Day ...

Mothers' Day 2018

Mums, regardless of species, have one thing in common: they love their babies.

And the babies look to their mummies, knowing that this is the person who will care for them like no one else.

It's a heart bond ...

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

Many people I know associate this song with Christmas ... or with the clever Staples back-to-school commercials.

Me? 


I associate this festive song with calving. I can't wait to start humming it. Just like a kid with presents under the tree, I peer at the mums-to-be each time I pass them.

This year it was this morning. I got the phone call I had been waiting for since Valentine's Day.

"Mile Corner. Jory spotted her. He's sending you a picture ..."

And look who had shown up!

This is my sparkle and cheer time of year and is far more exciting to me than unwrapping presents. Each calf is a unique gift. And after a particularly long, difficult winter, what a beautiful way to start off the season! What should we name it?! The first baby of the year has to get named ...
and there could be a prize involved!

Here are some "Mum and Me" snaps from last year. 

There is nothing that whispers hope more sweetly.

And isn't that what the most wonderful time of the year is all about?

Country Boy Meets City Girl

Four years ago today, the Good Rancher and I tied the knot.

Then he brought me out to live on the 855 and I quickly discovered that knot tying is far more complicated than I had ever dreamed.

Do you know how many different knots a person can tie? The Good Rancher's son tried to show me some a couple of times. I was all thumbs.

And all I ended up doing was tying myself in knots. Within a few months I had had a breakdown - previous life events I thought I had put behind me started coming to the surface and threatening to unravel my tightly coiled self. I was diagnosed with PTSD, with major depressive disorder, and with anxiety.

Thanks to God's grace, in conjunction with my wonderful doctors and therapists, I am slowly weaving the useable strands of my old life with the threads of this new life.

The thing is that through it all, the Good Rancher has stood by me, stuck with me, cared for me, loved me. His patience has been like nothing I have ever experienced. On the days I could barely brush my teeth and comb my hair, he would call me Gorgeous.

"How can you say that? Are you being facetious?" I would lash out tearfully.

"I see your heart," he would reply. "Your heart is beautiful."

My first Christmas out here, our friends Bud and Rhonda gave me a little moment in time captured in an ornament. They called it Country Boy Meets City Girl. He's chasing after her, offering a frog which she is vehemently repudiating:

But look at the back of the little figurines: in his other hand, he's holding a bunch of flowers: 

I'm positive he got the girl ...💕🌼

Nothing comes easy to a city girl living in the country for the first time - especially when the notion of girl had been discarded about four decades earlier, and most especially when everyone knows you can't teach an old dog new tricks!

Still, here we were today, wind howling and whipping steely shavings of snow into eyes and ears, winter exerting a death grip on machinery and causing cattle and horses to shuffle wearily into what shelter they could find.

My friend Merle composed me an ode for the occasion:

Subject: Happy anniversary

I looked out the window
To see what would be
The wind was a howling
I barely could see

My thoughts went to K
Celebrating her fourth
The wind still at top speed
Right out of the north.
 
Oh what will she do
On this most special day
She sure as the heck
Can't go outside to play

She'll be stranded at home
Or at least so it seems
But lucky for her
So's the man of her dreams

---------------------------------------------------

I was inspired to respond:

Just another work day
At the old Triple T
The calves must be fed
The dogs have to pee

The snow does not quit
The colts' feet are froze
It's V-day as well -
Not even a rose?


She writes out his card
She makes a hot meal
And three chilly men
Say she's the real deal

The man of her dreams

Spends his day in the snow
Wheels fell off the bale truck -
To town he MUST go

The road is adrift

Along with their plan

For a trip to Red Deer -

Prime Rib and a flan

But this evening the sky
Will be golden and pink
and they'll sit in their house
With some food and a drink

Then they'll play with five dogs
and they'll watch some TV
And because they're in luuuuv
It's a great 'versary!

It took the Good Rancher over three hours to get to town and back.

But when he arrived home, he was carrying a package of steaks ... my favourite Tim Hortons Uncomplicated Latte ... and this:

He never even glanced at the disaster that used to be the kitchen island, and which I had hoped to clean today but never had the energy.

He just looked at me and said, "This is for you, Gorgeous. I am so blessed to have you in my life."

Actually, Good Rancher, I am far more greatly blessed.

I'm so glad we can be at home this evening as the wind starts up again and the roads are sheets of ice.

Happy fourth anniversary.

111 Days

Very few words are needed with pictures like these, which tell the story of this week:

 The day before surgery, he was unable even to open his eyes. The circumference of his head had grown again. 

Post op. "The first 24 hours were not super."

Oxygen removed, leaving just the feeding tube. Because he had a rough time after the surgery, the little pads were left in place in case there was further need to be hooked up again.

Held secure.

"Tube and tape free!"

Mummy's and Daddy's observations this week:

"His head circumference came down by 1 cm and his skull seems more stable (less thin and fragile to touch). His hand grip is back to being strong and he is responding appropriately - a long step from the little, quiet rag doll that we saw over the previous 10-14 days. His neurosurgery team are happy with his progress and his MRI yesterday showed some reduction in the dilation of his ventricles. They anticipate about a 2 week period for things to settle out for Levi's new baseline ...

"We've been able to have lots of time holding our boy, which seems to be the best therapy for him ... and us. 

"We continue to pray for protection from infection and malfunction of the shunt, but are so grateful to God for making the way clear - first to wait, and then to proceed at the right time - His time ...

"We thank the Lord that He is patient with us, He is wise and He is kind, as some have reminded us. We thank you for loving us and reminding us of who God is when the darkness hides His face."